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| you might not know it but those two words can really be the most 2 strongest words to some people. move on... hmm well after i graduate i thought about what i wanna do... im getting ready to apply myself to UH but one of the counselors said that in order for me to get in, i need 24 TRANSFERABLE credit so i have to go talk to my coundelor at heald about all that shit. BUT my next option was to go kcc if they didnt accept me... pretty good back up eh? the problem is that the clas i want comes only every 2 years at kcc, and the next one jus started and im too late for enrollment. and i thought to myself, do i really wanna wait 2 years for the next one? no. because i know ima get too lazy to go back to school. so i had to think of a next back up. so i really thought about it. NOTHING in this island, possibly even world makes me happy ANYMORE. especilly after those 2 words were given to me. i mean i know i have friends, but i dont have CLOSE friends, friends thast actually care about my feelings, friends who calls me up jus to call me up. everybodys got their on life and their own things to worry about, its how life is. i have no one to talk to, so i have freeking WRITE IT ON A STUPID WEB PAGE jus to get stuff of my shoulders so i thought about going to Arizona, because they have one of they best surgery schoolings over there. and yannoe, everywhere i go in this island reminds me of tht someone. when i go to the beach, when i go morning glory, when i go to mckiley, ewa, fucking everywhere that we've spent time together does. and i figure, hey theres no beach in arizona :) no memories. all gewd right? so i told my mom about it, and she broke down crying. and shes telling me we're low on money, if i leave theres no one to help my parents out ( i give all my paycheck to tem). i know shes only telling me all this because she doesnt wanna see her baby leave. but i cant be here anymroe. i figure if imma move on... imma MOVE ON. i dont wanna break my moms heart. but what else can i do? i dont even feel happy abut my own graduation...... i know weird but shit your jus gonna die right? ahhhh jus shut thee fffuucckk uuupppp drop a line if you think it got what it takes xoxoxoxo all the fucking way | | |
| Rest In Peace Victoria Tran. i love you baby. dont worry about Dustin, he's a strong boy. i'll see you again later. someday. __________________________________________________________-- something just hit me, ever since this year started every month that went by someone would leave me. ive lost 3 friends i the pass 3 months. and every time i lose one i would always think about him. i could never tell him how i feel, no matter howww confident i feel. i had soo much times to tell him how i feel but i would never tell him EVERYTHING? it makes me think - if not now... it could be nver yannoe? the number one thing i've always wanted to know is... im i wasting my time? .... fuck this shit, nvm i cant finish this | | |
| So for some time now, i've been trying really hard to find a shooting star becasue im the only person i know whos never seen one before. it was really fustrating for a while but something hit me. i already found a shooting star. MY own shooting star. i always pictured my self seeing a shooting star and being sooo happy! i can see my self jumping around and telling everybody about it. but i know it would only last about a day or 2 and i would forget about it. but, this shooting star that i found, its something more special lol, i found it about 5 years ago, and im still talking about em :) ive always wonder why i have never seen an actual shooting star before but yannoe what? maybe its a sign? maybe he's the only shooting star that i need to see. i deno? well imma try a couple more times to find an actual shooting star and if i still cant find one, imma jsut give up and stick it to the one i have lolz hes not exactly mines, but yannoe what i mean :) | | |
| o my gushness! lolz im stuck in such a dilema!! ok, so the greatteesstt news ever!! i got him for valentines!!! he sed yes hehe. but heres where the trouble starts, i just remembered i got work at the clinic from 8-11 n then school from 12 till 2 then work at the hospital from 5 -8 all on valentines day!!. im gonna try ask my supervisor if i can get the clinic off, and i think imma skip school that day. and hopefully my coworker will work for me at the hospital *** crossing my fingers**** now now, thats just part of my dramas, i have nooo idea what to get him? i asked most of the boys at work what they would like for valentines, one of the boys said balloons and a bear.... i looked at him like "what are you gay?" n plus i wanna get him something that he would actually use. another one of the guys said a mountain bike. i tohught that was pretty funny i mean i did ask them something he could use but , how am i gonna give it to him? " hi, heres a mountain bike for valentines, have a lovely day and have fun riding it"? how is he gonna fit it in his car going home? lolz anyways i asked another guy at work and he said he wouldnt mind pussy for valentines hahah, what a fucking whore. but im not that kinda girl. so i had to cross that out. the third problem i have is, the plans. i dont have anyyyyy idea what we're gonna do??!! dinner and a movie is so..... freshmen year lolz. been there done that. but i have a strong feeling, that's probably what we're just gonna end up doing? ohh....
any idea anybody? helppp???? lolz what are you doing for valentines??
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| my bird freklez died. FUCKING 3RD BIRD that died on me, thats it. NO MORE FUCKIN BIRDS!!! their too fragile, and kinda erking. they dont ever shut up and they make a mess everywhere. but then again.... they were still mines... :( right now im at netwerx with my friends. the last time i came here was proably 2 and a healf years ago. danny hacked into ronnies account n now im using it lolz. anyways. punaho carnival starts tomorrow i think? i deno if i wanna go, its always the same old boring rides. and ive always wanted one of those humongus bears, but never had a chance to win it. its alright i guess. i dont have anymore room in my houes for it. work, work, and works a bitch. so is school. made a calander with pictures on it. i just gotta go print it out. my favorite one that i made was the month of may. i deno how to load it in here... so too bad :) anyways ronnies mins are dying. write later. | | |
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